Little green hummingbird

Have I ever cried like this before?

All those dress rehearsals to find that Love can be so pure. It breathes a life of it’s own within me. I want to stop it, to make it understand there is no place for it to go but the heart of it keeps beating.

I cannot regret this hurt because I love, and even this horrible hurt is more than I would have if he had not come into my life. I am all but delirious in my need to feel him beside me again, just once more, to sit side by side and feel the tug of what could have been. I would not trade a moment of this terrible hurt if it meant that I would have to give back the moments I cherish.

To find such total joy and have it taken after one small glance is a bitter thing. Yet now I truly understand that it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

We are helpless creatures, we cannot choose who or when we love. But we should rejoice that we are allowed these beautiful feelings, even if they are fleeting. What would life be without the contrasts of love and loss.

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