Forest in Chile

I found me

I looked everywhere,
and when I came back,
I found me.
– Suanne

It seems like I have spent a huge part of my life trying to be someone else. I keep “becoming” other people (I’m not talking about split-personalities) I’m talking about personal evolution. That’s what growing up and learning is all about. That’s the honest process of life.

I see so many people standing in one place, people who could be so much more, people who are not even close to fulfilling their life potential. That saddens me. I have this terrible habit, when I realize a relationship, friendship, romance, etc. is going to end I tell the truth – not that I lie to people normally, but I tell them the things they don’t want to hear about themselves. I’ve always hoped that they would consider it a gift one day, something that helped them change their lives for the better. I’m brutally honest with myself too, so I don’t play favorites.

I guess my philosophy is that it’s very unfair for an ex-whatever to walk around and say things like “He’d have been great if only he could have…” or “She’d have been great if only she had…”. Sharing the insights of the people you’ve known intimately with them is a gift. Why not just say those things out loud? Why do we think it’s wrong to do that? I don’t think it is wrong, even if someone doesn’t like hearing it maybe one day that will be the thing that gives them strength to face something they have been hiding from.

Speak the truth but leave immediately after.
– Slovenian Proverb

I’m working on my own personal truisms, I have to figure out how to do this “boy-girl thing”, I want to learn how to stop pushing the people I most care for away, it would be nice if I could let someone take care of me without worrying about whether or not they’ll be there tomorrow.

I’m always surprised when a lesson pops up in front of me. That’s been happening a lot in the last few years, maybe because acknowledgment is the first step towards opening yourself up to solutions and resolution. If you’re willing to see it, perhaps the answer is always in arms reach.

I don’t know if that’s true or not, I kind of hope so.

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